Which way are you going?

When I first got my drivers license I remember driving down a local South Melbourne street, York Street, the wrong way! There were a couple of oncoming cars but we were all moving slowly so I think I got away with it.

Plus, the car I was driving was my aunt's and it had interstate number plates on it! "Oh, ok, she's not from around here!"

I've always remembered the intersection to that street and when I drive past it now, I'm so very conscious of how it's 'one way'. It looks and sounds different to the whizzing traffic that flows both ways along a road or motorway. 

Earlier this week in a client workshop, I remembered that one way street incident.

I was listening to a leader communicate their key messages about a change program and how the leaders and team members would have to do this, that, the other ... and oh, this other thing over here. 

It was all so 'one way'. 

Contrast that to another leader who I heard from yesterday. She opened the topic up for conversation. She wanted to hear what people thought about what they'd already heard about the change. This was before her 'sermon' on what was to be. 

By allowing a 'two way street', she was able to hear their key concerns and then pitch her information to address those concerns. 

It all flowed so well. They talked some… then she responded… then they asked some questions… and she engaged further. Yes it was the two way street of communication! So simple, but sometimes so tricky to bring to the situation you're in, particularly if it's a tough or tricky conversation.

She later told me her heart was thumping in anticipation because she didn't know what they'd say or what their questions or concerns might be. She had some ideas, but was really heading into some unknown territory. 

Oh yes… uncertainty! It does wonders for our defences! It brings them on in a flurry.

So rather than head down that one way street like I did, I encourage you to travel the two way street of communication... slowly. A little from them… then over to you… then back to them. It's the push and pull of communication, engagement and facilitation.

Every conversation, meeting, workshop or session you're in can benefit from it. Not to mention the other 'drivers' in that meeting. 

Take it slow, proceed with caution and keep things moving two ways. It's too dangerous otherwise.