Connecting with no watercooler

Many people grieve the spontaneous and serendipitous connections at the watercooler. 

Lots of moments have been lost with remote work: 
interactions in the kitchen, collecting documents from the printer, walking to and from (and in) the bathroom, riding the elevator, walking to the station or car park, strolling to the cafe, walking between meetings...

So many incidental interactions and happy collisions (or avoidance 🥸) that were happening, and now aren’t. 

Alex Howland, Ph.D. suggests 4 ways to spark watercooler moments in Forbes:
1 camera off and avatar on
2 channels for non-work conversations
3 cross functional digital events
4 creative virtual worlds. 


🎯 AND these techniques work well with teams I’ve been working with:
- drop in zoom for coffee or chat, anytime
- shorts: 12 minute check ins and catch ups
- play time: virtual casual play time, reminiscent of school days, no work only play
- commute pairs: hang out with 1 other person as you begin your work, to chat, connect and share 
- cowork: mics off and cameras on for calm companionship. 

Experiments are useful. What will you try? 

It’s the creative challenge of the changing times we’re in. 

Connecting deeper ... remotely

In these hybrid times when people may be here, there and anywhere, there’s a danger we miss the good quality, deep connections. 

Not the login type of connection - nor the break the ice chit-chat connection. 

But rather, the deeper ability to engage with people, to bring warmth, humanity and empathy to an online call with a remote team. 

To say ‘it’s not the same as face to face’ or ‘it’s hard to read cues and body language’ is to try to use the same techniques. 

But you may have to do something different. Many things different. 

How can you better connect with your team no matter where they are? 

Many days of each week I’m working with a brand new team, a new group of people I’ve not met before. Swift and deep connection with them is a priority. 

We’ve got to be able to get close online, to trust and build engagement so we can achieve what needs to be achieved. 

And quickly. 

Consider how you’ll make connections with your team, group or meeting participants. 

Every time. 

Don’t leave it to chance. 
Or think it’s not important. 
Or that you’re already well enough connected. 

How deeply you can connect with people affects everything else that follows. 

What’s the backstory and how will you uncover it

Many a meeting or workshop happens because we want to gather ideas from people, or ‘bring them along’ as a group or team. 

And each meeting presents ideal opportunities to connect, engage and share stories. 

But some meetings don’t allow even a few minutes here and there to listen and learn from people’s experiences. 

It’s such a shame we might push on with progress and not value this experience. 

If you’re feeling a disconnect or distance in your team or group, be sure to build in and allow time for sharing stories. 

It’s how we make sense of what’s going on. 

Invest some time:
- at the start of meetings
- between agenda items
- returning from breaks
... to hear from people. 

Give more time to understand a backstory or personal perspective. 

It can help inform what happens next. 

Build engagement slowly

Starting with a bang in a meeting may seem like the way to get people’s attention - but the reverse can also be true. As we join the next meeting in our diary, we bring with us a hangover from the previous one.

The previous meeting could have been overwhelming with too much information, or frustrating in how decisions weren’t made. It could have been time wasting or unclear or .... highly entertaining, interactive and uplifting!

Every meeting leaves us with a kind of hangover that we need to unload or process. The guide then for facilitating or leading better meetings is to build engagement s-l-o-w-l-y. Slow and steady style.

That means:

> Not putting people on the spot at the start, or ever

> Not making them look foolish, and

> Not making them wrong.

It’s easy to put people off or get them offside in meetings - online or otherwise Ramp or build engagement with participants slowly, steadily ... even if you’re in a hurry to make things happen. There is plenty going on for people. Lead meeting speed safely.

Over managed and under led

These words oozed from Darren Hill's mouth to a packed venue full of people who'd come along to learn and think about the Future of Leadership:

"We're over managed, and under led!"

Darren's a behavioural scientist and he's been studying people - and specifically leaders - for a few years now. 

In his presentation at The Future of Leadership event in Melbourne recently, he said that leaders have always needed to:

• manage pressure
• make progress, and
• establish connection

My visual notes from the session captured his key points.

In today's workplaces, leaders need to 'deal drugs'. No, not illicit drugs, but the human chemicals that drive our behaviour!

As Darren talked about adrenaline, cortisol, endorphins, dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin, it became clear that leaders indeed need to lead, to manage the pressure that change brings and to ensure the team makes progress. 

Leaders need to be the heart of connection in the team, to help celebrate failure and to understand these powerful human chemicals and how they impact team performance, behaviour and success. 

Are you leading... or still occupying yourself with managing things? 

'One person can make a B - I - G difference,' he said.

The Future of Leadership event heads to Brisbane, Australia on October 14. Get tickets here because 100% of the ticket sales go to Hands Across the Water. Now that's leadership!