You don’t have to be the perfect leader

In fact you don't need to be the 'perfect' anything: friend, parent, partner, colleague, companion. Setting yourself an expectation to be perfect at anything is a journey to disappointment.

And that's what disappointment is : it's the gap between what happens and what your expectation is.

Ease off.

You don't need to try so hard, work so hard or work so long. This drive for perfect anything or everything is making us way too hard on ourselves.

Where might you benefit from easing off on an expectation you have of yourself?

Careful how you answer this popular job interview question!

Next time you’re preparing for a job role interview, think carefully. If a potential employer asks the classic question about weaknesses, what will you say?

Many people offer in response to the ‘What’s your greatest weakness?’ question that they're a perfectionist. They think it still sounds positive, not too bad a weakness.

Saying you're a perfectionist can sound like you're a hard worker and that you have high standards. But beware! Perfectionism isn’t turning out to be a good trait after all.

Recent data from PhD researchers Curran and Hill have uncovered that perfectionism is on the rise globally and it's a behaviour that's not making us feel good about ourselves nor helping us bring our best to a job role. Perfectionism has links to depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, migraines, asthma, insomnia and plenty of other nasties.

It's time to stop putting our hand up for something that isn't helping us or a potential employer.

What's a weakness you'd rather share in an interview ... that's not perfectionism?

Not a perfectionist?

Not a perfectionist, just going for high standards. High standards are important. Need to keep working on this thing, tweaking it, making it 'better'.

This article in Yahoo Finance identifies four signs of perfectionism:

1. ‘Not good enough, yet’

2. There’s no end in sight to a project or task

3. Keep tweaking and tinkering

4. Working late or long hours Is this you or someone you know?

Read more via the article...

It's not binary

I’ve posted recently on productivity, quality and getting out of your own way.

My new book ’ish - The problem with our pursuit for perfection and the life changing practice of good enough’ is out now.

A fear I’ve heard is: if we 'ish' anything it will mean the ‘crapification’ of everything. People will care less, do less and not bother about anything anymore.

But woah there, wait a moment; ish isn't that binary, on/off, black/white. 'ish' means somewhat, approximately and it's not for every situation.

'To ish or not to ish’ is one of the book's chapters. Some things are suitable to be good enough or 'ish', others not.

You see, perfectionism is a problem, a growing global addiction causing depression, anxiety, overthinking, burnout, insomnia and other health issues. It’s worth finding ways to tackle our unhealthy pursuit for perfect that shows up in our daily thinking, behaviours, tasks, activities and projects.

Join me as we find new ways to think and work that don't require our pursuit for perfection but rather help us go for things that are fit for purpose.

The road to nowhere

There you are about to start a new project or task. You're ready to go. You're ready to start ... but do you know when or where you will stop? Might you end up working on this task, idea or project and it has no known end?

How do you know where the end is?

I've learned much working with software developers these past 10 years; they work out the 'definition of done' before they even get started. How smart is that! To know when you'll be 'done' before you even get going!

The alternative is that crazy space where you start but you don't know what the finish looks like. Well you do, but it's a conjuring, your imagination at work, creating an image in your mind.

We're clever humans but bringing a mental image into reality is a tricky thing to do. This is why the pursuit of perfect is such a waste. The image keeps changing and we don't know when to stop.

Before you get started, work out where you will stop. Marathon runners do it; airlines, pilots and planes do it; taxis, trains and Ubers do it; chefs with recipes do it. What are you or the team working on right now that has no defined stop point? You're on a road to nowhere.

Pause, define the stop point and then re-start.