The extroverts will take care of themselves

How are you engaging, connecting and facilitating interactions among a diverse team? 

Winging it doesn’t work. 
Letting things flow can cause problems later. 
Denying you need to do something deliberate can also be fraught. 

Introverts
Extroverts. 
Ambiverts. 

All belong. 
All have much to bring, give and contribute. 

But if you’re waiting for them, you’re missing the point of leadership. 

You can set up a process, a constraint, an activity or use deliberate techniques that will get the best out of everyone. 

This article on how ambiverts - who have both introvert and extrovert qualities - benefit the workplace is a good one. It reminds us that there are people different to us. 

And as the world of work evolves to the next phase of hybrid, returning to offices and working from anywhere, maintaining connections across difference and diversity is a necessary and powerful leadership capability. 

What are you:
- Introvert?
- Extrovert?
- Ambivert? 

Intermittent persistence

Working long and hard and burning out is too common a situation. In our quest to achieve we try to over achieve. (I wrote about this in ‘ish: The problem with our pursuit for perfection and the life changing practice of good enough’.)

If we are driven to work and achieve, how do we stop?

Unfortunately we can tend to adopt a type of relentless persistence where we just don’t give up! Persistence is a great characteristic but there are times when it’s dangerous to continue. We see it in working long and late hours, not taking a pause or break, all for productivity.

Equally damaging to our progress and well-being is resistance, to reject or obstruct and get in the way of getting things done. We block progress by putting up barriers. Or we may hear a mentor or coach suggest we need to ‘get out of our own way’. This is resistance.

Where is there progress, productivity ...and wellbeing? It’s in sprint and rest or ‘intermittent persistence’. It’s being ‘on’, really on. And then to be off, to rest and recover, reflect and consolidate. And then to go again and be ‘on’.

Persistence is good.

Intermittent is better. 

An easier skill for the future

Futurists and foresight genies tell us the skills we need for the future. 

But what if we had a skill that just made things easier, less difficult? How good would that be!

There’s a mix of skills that are a stand out in the world of work - they're about collaboration, safety, inclusion and progress. They help get things done, in ways that help people work together, and make them feel safer and included.

Great leaders know that facilitation - not the hippy ‘what do others think’, bell-dinging moderator, wafting about a room - but an outcome-focused, engagement-driven enabler who helps people do better work together - is a power-house competency. Facilitation helps support a team to achieve the 'magic four'.

To be:

1️⃣effective

2️⃣productive

3️⃣collaborative, and

4️⃣creative.

All at once! Drop one and the team, project or work suffers, crumbles.

Facilitation means 'ease'. It’s no wonder it’s the skill of the moment.

Keep it moving through the team

Playing well on a team means not slowing things down unnecessarily or holding things up. To collaborate, contribute, do our bit or add our expertise to a piece of work, is a fundamental part of work.

It's rare we work in total isolation - unless in our own business - even then, we might have a team member, suppliers and ... customers.

Do you know how your working style impacts the 'flow' of work through the team? Are you searching for 'more' or to make something you're working on 'better' before it's 'done' or handed on to others?

Perfectionism and the pursuit of 'right' isn't just an individual thing; it has a huge flow on effect for the wider team and beyond through the organisation, to customers and clients.

This article talks about the impact of perfectionism on the team.

Have you been slowed down in a team where someone might be going for perfect?

Love to hear your thoughts. 

How to work with people ... when you don't want to work with people

In this era of increased, required (and expected) collaboration, it can be tough to work with people, if there are times when you don’t feel like working with people!

Particularly if you see yourself as more of an introvert or ambivert or shy, or you're dealing with some sh*t in your life. Showing up and putting on your ‘collaboration face’ can be tough if you’d rather work alone.

For some it’s a feeling of social anxiety where we might find the interaction, talking or problem solving parts of working with others a challenge or uncomfortable. Some days collaboration is one of the last things you feel like doing, especially if you think there are more pressing things to do or important alone work to be done. For some people who get frustrated easily or have less patience and want to just get stuff done, collaboration can feel slow or time consuming or plain annoying.

Yes indeed, many of us are loners and may well prefer to be alone, work alone and do it all alone. 

When we are required (or strongly encouraged) to join a project, team, group, workshop, planning session or conference that suggests networking and games to 'get to know each other’ ... maybe we just don't want to. 

But isn't collaboration a 100% positive thing?

While we might understand the benefits and positives of collaboration, sometimes we just need some breathing space and prefer space alone.

It can be overwhelming for some people to be constantly in the company of others. Think of people who have customer service and customer facing roles in high volume and high pressure environments. Or those who are constantly problem solving with others, dealing with group behaviours, beliefs and barriers for an extended period of time. 

Recharging, retreating or relaxing

We often need to grab some time alone and recharge or be with people we can fully relax around and not be expected to collaborate. 

You might have seen people lunching alone at a busy conference, or having quiet time to get stuff done or taking some time away from a group meeting or workshop. They may well retreat to recharge. 

And of course, for many, we know there may be plenty of other humans who you absolutely must collaborate with when you get home - that includes pets, partners, friends or family, members in community groups and others in the interests and network groups we are part of. 

Are we 'over collaborating?'

At times things can feel ‘over collaborated’; that is, we’re required to do so much with others, there never seems to be a break from team, group or unit work. 

In the work I do bringing teams together, working with leadership groups and helping people co-design, co-create, decide and do, there are always always always people who don’t want to play in this group space. They may be forced into it by colleagues or have gentle pressure (and guilt?) applied by leaders that insist that collaboration is ‘the way’ or the expectation is constantly there, yet they would prefer to contribute in other ways that don’t involve full-on collaboration.

The messages that 'the group is wiser with you' or 'everyone has their strength' are high on inspiration (and yes, fact) but they can also be low on the practicalities of what to do if you just don’t want to work with others. 

So when you’re next faced with a workshop, meeting, space or situation where you’re expected to collaborate an don’t feel like, there are some things you can do.

Cohesion over collaboration

There are other roles you can play in collaborative environments that don't require you to be the leading light and winner of the collaborative stakes.

Rather you can play a role that builds the cohesion of the group, keeps the group or team together, performing and progressing well.

Sometimes cohesion is better than collaboration.

If you adopt a role of helping the group stick together, you don’t need to be the star of the show or the loudest mouth or need to present yourself as the wisest in the room. You’re simply playing the ‘glue’ that helps the group ‘stick’. 

Here’s what you can do:

1. think about the role you can play; this may not be your normal role or default behaviour. So how else could you be, what could you do or how could your act to contribute and collaborate and build cohesion? 
2. adopt a role that is not IN the group, but rather FOR the group.  What could you do that places you in a support role - you’re still contributing and doing, but not as one of the collaborators?
3. think about offering to facilitate, guide or enable the process and progress of the group. This is real cohesion work. Think of it like a tour guide or an air traffic controller. You’re not the artist of the artworks you’re explaining in the museum, you’re taking people through and showing them. You’re not flying the planes landing at the airport, rather you’re helping keep the planes in order; which one first, which one next. 
4. be at the service of the group; what do they need right now? Do they need someone to listen, scribe, time keep, summarise, present back or distill or make sense?
5. lead a session rather than contribute content to it; ask the team questions - get people’s input, ideas, suggestions and contributions. Your role is then to listen, to make sense of, to get them talking. This is a mega-cohesion activity. Good stuff!
6. be the listener, the hearer. Too many meetings, workshops and sessions are full of people intent on putting their points of view across as soon as possible. Take on the role of a listener, a distiller. What are you hearing? Who said what? What did that mean? Are there similar points of view in the room? Are there different points of view? This helps to keep the group together despite differences. 
7. And importantly, let people know you’re taking on another or different role in the meeting or workshop and that you are being at the service of the group and to the group or team’s outcome. 

Expected and respected

Collaboration is an expected part of work these days. You've got to find ways that respect the values, expectations and behaviours of the workplace, but that also work for you. It’s important also to not ‘disappear’; don’t be invisible. Look for ways where you are contributing to a purpose, doing something that is of value to you and the team, as well as being helpful to all. This is great cohesion work. 

Your team mates will likely prefer to work with someone who’s supportive, helpful and collaborative in nature, rather than a grumpy quiet anti-collaborationist who skips meetings and gatherings and shows up in what might look like passive aggressive mode (even if you’re not!)

Plan ahead

In this era of collaboration, you’ll probably want to avoid the image of ’not being a collaborator’, so remember to plan ahead.

What meetings or gatherings have you got coming up?

What can you do before, during or after the event that is of service, help and assistance - and is just as valuable as you sitting around the table or being in the room contributing and collaborating as others are?

You be awesome

You have wonderful gifts, skills, talents and expertise to share and contribute. Acknowledge that sometimes you may not feel like playing with others. When that’s the case, adopt another role to help build cohesion in the group or event. You’ll contribute more than you’ll know!